In relationships… 

When I was 16, I taught kids Tajweed at our local masjid. One day, two of my students argued and their voice raised and I noticed that there is something wrong happening. I understood that both were ‘fighting’ to sit next to me. I was like, really?! I started to talk to both that we have to love for others what we love for ourselves, waiting for either of them to leave the place for her sister. No one did. I don’t remember what I finally did but I remember that I went home angry explaining to my father what happened. He smiled. He told me that this also happens among the educated elders! I found that strange. I know that the older you are the wiser you become, but I think that’s not in reality. Sometimes you have to give clear orders so people can listen and obey. Don’t expect people to understand from your indirect speech, you just have to state what you want people to do clearly. 

I had a friend, she used to be my best and my closest, who changed in so many ways, in the way she thinks of religion, freedom and many other things. We used to agree on things, but when principles change, I say to myself I have to be careful even if that person was my sister. I was thinking of a way to stop my relationship with whom I spent my uni life with- and I don’t remember that I ever had a friend who lasted for more than maybe seven years in my life (due to the many travels my family did, and moving from one place to another) Anyway, I thought that I have to take serious steps in our friendship or else my religion might be affected. The only way to keep our relationship good was to be honest and tell her not to ever discuss things that we don’t agree on, especially when it comes to religion and how it is practiced. I understand that we might be different and that is something beautiful. But it’s never good when what changes us will make us feel that, “I am better than you” … stating what you feel in an open conversation will save you from very bad endings. 

When I notice that one of my siblings attitude changed to the better I motivate him. I tell him/ her that I love you for what you are doing or fir trying to be a better person. Noticing the good attitude without uttering the words to that person won’t give the same results.

“O my father, hire him. Indeed, the best one you can hire is the strong and the trustworthy.” Quran surah al-Qasas 26 

This is what the woman said to her father when she noticed his good character. Then her father married him to his daughter. Saying what we truly feel whether good or bad is relief. It does make a difference. 

In some situations, the second person might understand your indirect speech, but he needs to hear it, to make sure that you hate, need or loves him. 

Saying, “I love you”, “I am sorry”, “I hate you”, “I need you” can change a life. 

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فكم أجعل لك من صلاتى؟‏  How much of my supplications should I devote to you? 💙

Ubayy bin Ka’b (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:

When one- third of the night would pass, Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) would get up and call out, “O people, remember Allah. The Rajifah (i.e., the first Blowing of the Trumpet which will shake the whole universe and thus cause all life to cease) has come, followed by Ar-Radifah (i.e., the second Blowing of the Trumpet which will restore life and thus mark the Resurrection Day). Death has approached with all that it comprises. Death has approached with all that it comprises.” I said: “O Messenger of Allah (ﷺ), I frequently invoke Allah to elevate your rank. How much of my supplications should I devote to you?” He said, “You may devote as much as you wish.” When I suggested a quarter, he said, “Do whatever you wish, but it will be better for you if you increase it.” I suggested half, and he said, “Do whatever you wish, but it will be better for you if you increase.” I suggested two- thirds, and he said, “Do whatever you wish but it will be better for you if you increase it.” I said, “Shall I devote all my supplications invoking Allah to elevate your rank?” He said, “Then you will be freed from your worries and your sins will be forgiven.”

[At- Tirmidhi].

Allahumma salli wasallem wa barek ‘alaa Mohammed 💙

وعن أبي بن كعب رضي الله عنه‏:‏ كان رسول الله صلى الله عليه وسلم‏:‏ إذا ذهب ثلث الليل، قام فقال‏:‏ ‏”‏يا أيها الناس اذكروا الله، جاءت الراجفة، تتبعها الرادفة، جاء الموت بما فيه، جاء الموت بما فيه” قلت‏:‏ يا رسول الله إنى أكثر الصلاة عليك، فكم أجعل لك من صلاتى‏؟‏ قال‏:‏ “ما شئت” قلت‏:‏ الربع‏؟‏ قال‏:‏ “ما شئت، فإن زذت فهو لك” قلت‏:‏ فالنصف‏؟‏ قال‏:‏ ما شئت فإن زذت فهو لك قلت ” فالثلثين‏؟‏ قال‏:‏ ما شئت فإن زدت فهو خير لك” قلت‏:‏ أجعل لك صلاتى كلها‏؟‏ قال‏:‏ “إذا تكفى همك، ويغفر لك ذنبك” 

‏(‏‏(‏رواه الترمذى وقال‏:‏ حديث حسن‏)‏‏)‏‏.

اللهم صلّ وسلّم وبارك على محمد 💙

Silence. 

‘There are places and moments of such an absolute beauty that no words are needed. These are the moments when I cherish silence at most, because I can concentrate on all my senses and let them go, freely, to be nurtured by the wonders surrounding me.

Gaza beach

Maybe it’s just me, but I feel that silence enhances the experience. Words can be spoken… afterwards…’

Day after day, I realize how important it is to be capable to enjoy the beautiful things in life unsullied by bad people! 

Day after day, I realize how important it is to respect myself, my mind, my health and most importantly my principles. 

Day after day, I understand why it’s important to neglect what people say so I can live my “one” life the way I pictured it, believing that I am the one who is to control my life, NOT the people around me!

Day after day, I learn how to speak up for what I believe in, for what I love and hate!  To clearly say NO to things that I don’t want in my life.  

Day after day, I learn how to fully trust Allah, the Almighty, believing that He is the One and Only Who knows what I want and what is best for me. 

Gone? Opportunities are never gone.

Yes, things are delayed, but this doesn’t mean I wont get them. Yes, I failed so many times, but I’ve never been afraid to fail and I think I am strong enough to accept failure and I can’t accept not trying!! 

… I can almost hear their hurtful words echoing. Its not what they say, its what I believe in what matters! I learned how to neglect a lot of the people, a lot of the time! And alhamdulliah, “Depression” was never a word in my vocabulary, and wont ever be. 

It pains me to see people acting like fools putting their noses into other peoples affairs!